


Borrowed Feathers

by Queen_BeeChloe



Series: The Queen and Her Mirror [4]
Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Angst, F/M, Humor, POV Multiple, Romance, Some Fluff, Vampire AU, Were-creature AU, some violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-21
Updated: 2018-08-21
Packaged: 2019-06-22 23:52:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,648
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15593586
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Queen_BeeChloe/pseuds/Queen_BeeChloe
Summary: It's all over the news."Paris has been saved."It's all anyone is talking about. Ladybug and Chat Noir saved all of Paris. Healed all of the shadow creatures, all of the injuries.And somehow, got rid of all the bad memories.Ladybug and Chat Noir aren't quite sure how to tell everyone that that part wasn't them.Because none of the civilians even remember Queen Bee.None but Nathaniel Kutzburg.And Chloe Bourgeoise, who, since she can no longer transform, is technically a civilian. And plans to stay one. She can't transform, and she doesn't want to, anyway.But with Lila back in town sporting new blue feathers, she may not have a choice.





	1. Chloe

Chloe woke up slowly, the dream she'd just had still running through her mind.

The dream that was all about blood.

She wished that she could say that it had been a nightmare, but honestly? It had been the happiest she had felt in weeks, blood filling her mouth and slipping down her throat.

She couldn't remember whose blood she was drinking. It was probably because it hadn't mattered.

She hadn't cared whose blood it was. Just that she'd been able to finally satisfy the thirst that had slowly been building into her since...

'Since you forced your vampire side to come out while you were Queen Bee,' Pollen finished the thought for her. 'Since you embraced your vampire side and it started getting stronger. Now, even Queen Bee won't be fully free of the shadow creature in you.'

‘Doesn’t matter if I can’t turn into her anymore,’ Chloe pointed out, trying not to focus on how quiet Pollen’s voice was in her head now. Her voice got weaker and stronger in waves, but Chloe couldn’t help but notice that her volume was definitely trending down over time.

One of these days, Chloe wouldn’t be able to hear her at all.

She pushed that thought out of her mind and pushed herself up off the bed. She glanced over to see jars of honey sitting by her bed.

She could smell them when she inhaled, but the smell turned her stomach. She didn’t want honey.

Still, she couldn’t have what she wanted, so honey was her best bet.

She sighed and picked up one of the jars. She sank her teeth into it, grimacing as honey filled her mouth, but forcing herself to drink it anyway.

One jar wasn’t going to be enough and she knew it, but she couldn’t make herself drink any more. She was going to have to bring extra honey lemonade with her to school today. Hopefully, that would be enough. Hopefully she wouldn’t...

Chloe shook her head, pushing those thoughts out of her mind. There was point in worrying about it.

She got up and got dressed half-heartedly, not paying enough attention to the clothes that she was putting on to know if they actually matched or not. At this point, she really didn’t care.

She pulled her hair up into a ponytail, grabbed her school bag, and headed to the kitchen to get her honey lemonade.

Then she headed out to the car.

She’d taken to arriving to school just before the bell rang to limit how many chances people had to talk to her.

By people, she mostly meant Adrien and Marinette. Nathaniel hadn’t talked to her recently, though he kept staring at her like he wanted to, and occasionally came up to her and opened his mouth like he was about to say something before he turned bright red and ran away again.

To be honest, Chloe didn’t think she wanted to know whatever Nathaniel was trying to tell her. She didn’t think it was going to be anything good.

Because how could it be? She was turning into a monster, and Nathaniel was incredibly observant. He must be able to see that.

Chloe climbed into the car, and the driver took her to school.

She walked into the school building and headed to her classroom, sinking down into her desk, her classmates ignoring her, and a moment later, the bell rang.

She thought she’d managed to avoid having any conversations with her classmates when she saw the paper on the desk.

She waited until the teacher’s back was turned, and then she opened the paper, and found herself looking at a drawing of her, a drawing that could only be Nathaniel’s.

Her breath caught in her throat when she saw it.

Because it was a picture of her. Chloe.

But with Queen Bee’s wings, Queen Bee’s heels. He’d colored this picture in, so that she could see that he’d made her eyes a soft, honey gold.

Underneath the drawing he’d written the words  _We need to talk_ in big, swooping letters she couldn’t miss.

Chloe twisted around in her seat to stare back at Nathaniel. He met her eyes, his gaze full of an impossibly calm, knowing lot.

Chloe’s heart hammered in her chest. But he couldn’t know. He couldn’t know she was Queen Bee. She’d almost admitted she loved him as Queen Bee. She’d gotten jealous of Queen Bee in front of him. If he knew, she was going to die of embarrassment. Was it possible to catch fire because of embarrassment? Or explode? Or maybe turn into a frog? Actually, if he knew, turning into a frog would probably be the least of her problems, and that was not a statement Chloe had ever wanted to be true about any situation she was in.

Whatever expression was on her face must have been pretty funny, because Nathaniel’s lips started twitching. Then he put his hand to his mouth in a clear effort to stop himself from laughing, but the way his shoulders shook told her he wasn’t doing a very good job.

Chloe glared at him, but that just made him shake harder. So she turned around in her seat, forcing herself to look at the teacher, and did her best to pretend that Nathaniel didn’t exist.

But throughout the whole morning, her thoughts kept wondering back to him.

When it was finally time for lunch, Chloe stood to leave, and her eyes fell on Adrien.

She could tell from his face that he was going to come talk to her, that he wasn’t going to leave her alone any longer today.

She braced herself for another conversation she didn’t want to have as Adrien started to move toward to her, but then someone cleared their throat.

Adrien looked toward the sound and then stopped dead in his tracks. Chloe followed his eyes, and found herself looking at Nathaniel.

Nathaniel wasn’t looking at her though, his eyes locked on Adrien, his gaze full of an astonishing amount of determination. His lips moved in silent words, and Chloe felt butterflies flood her stomach when she realized what he was saying.  _I got Chloe._

Adrien looked at Nathaniel for a long moment, emotions warring on his face. Then he glanced over at Chloe again.

Chloe looked at him, then back to Nathaniel. Nathaniel caught her eyes this time and smiled softly, but that same determination still burned behind the smile, and his words rang through her mind as if he’d said them out loud. “I’ve got Chloe.” Blood flooded into Chloe’s face, and she couldn’t hold Nathaniel’s eyes anymore.

She looked away from him, glancing back at Adrien. Adrien studied her face for half a second, and then smiled knowingly.

Chloe huffed loudly and moved forward, but Adrien was in between her and the door. “Oh, just get out of my way, Adrien!” she snapped, and she could feel her classmates’ eyes turn to her, feel their shock that she was speaking that way to  _Adrien_ of all people. She shoved past him and ran out of the room, and she could hear Adrien burst into laughter behind her.

‘It’s not funny,’ she vented to Pollen as she headed out of the building, but Pollen didn’t respond to that.

Either that, or Chloe just couldn’t hear her anymore.

Chloe shoved that thought out of her mind. It wasn’t worth thinking about it. Pollen just wasn’t answering her. That wasn’t anything new.

‘Pollen, don’t ignore me,’ Chloe snapped, fear she couldn’t suppress flooding her.

Pollen still didn’t answer her.

Chloe stepped out of the building and ran down the stairs to hide beside him, out of view of people leaving the school. She leaned against the wall and looked down at her hands. They were shaking, but they weren’t purple. She wasn’t a vampire. Or at least, no more than usual.

But she also wasn’t Queen Bee, and that was the problem. She hadn’t been Queen Bee in far too long. She was slipping further and further into being a vampire, and that was why she was losing Pollen.

She reached into her bag and pulled out a bottle of honey lemonade, downing several gulps of it desperately. It burned her throat like acid on the way down.

Chloe coughed, grabbing her throat. She closed her eyes, and instead of darkness, all she saw was red liquid.

She forced her eyes open again and reached back into her bag, pulling out the picture Nathaniel had drawn of her. She looked at the wings he’d drawn her with, the honey gold eyes and the heels. The picture of her, part Chloe, part Queen Bee. More Queen Bee than she was ever going to be again.

Something inside of Chloe snapped like a twig, and Chloe sank to the ground, burying her head in her arms as the tears started flowing down her face, as the sobs started to make her shoulders shake.

She kept hoping that one of the friends she’d pushed away would come to help her, but no one came.

Chloe cried herself out eventually. She stayed on the ground for a while, forcing herself to drink more honey lemonade, hoping that her eyes wouldn’t be too puffy and red, but she was pretty sure that it was going to be pretty obvious that she’d been crying when she went back into class.

So she didn’t go back into class. She didn’t go back into the school building at all. Instead she walked away, heading to Master Fu’s.

He opened the door almost as soon as she knocked. He didn’t say anything, just looked at her face, smiled sadly, and then stepped back to let her in.

She took a seat at the table, but didn’t say anything. He didn’t speak either, choosing to make some tea instead.

He handed her a cup and she took a sip. The honey still turned her stomach, but it was still better than the honey lemonade.

Chloe drank the tea in silence, trying not to grimace as her stomach twisted with every sip of tea.

Master Fu sipped his own tea in silence as well, and after a few minutes, Chloe realized that he wasn’t going to say anything until she did.

She looked down at the cup in her hand, not able to face him as she spoke. “I can’t transform,” she said quietly, even though she knew that he already knew that, and therefore wasn’t surprised when he didn’t make any comment about it. “I can’t... I’m having a lot of trouble hearing Pollen too.” That statement was also greeted with silence, but he’d known that too. “And I... I don’t want honey anymore. I want...” She couldn’t finish the sentence. She hadn’t told him about her lack of love of honey, because she couldn’t make herself say out loud what she wanted instead.

There was a moment of silence, and then Master Fu finished the statement for her. “Blood.”

Chloe jerked at the word, looking up at him, tears threatening to spill down her face again. “I’m turning into a monster,” she whispered.

Master Fu frowned and shook his head. “That isn’t true.”

Chloe set the cup down onto the table a little harder than she meant to. “Yes, it is. I’m turning into a shadow creature! I’m losing control! I can’t sleep because of all the memories and the nightmares! I can’t hear Pollen because I let myself turn into a vampire while I was a were and infected Queen Bee! I can’t drink honey anymore because every time I try, the venom starts forming in my mouth again and it burns, and it does that because I tried to become more of a shadow creature! That’s the only reason I have venom! In what universe does that not make me a monster?”

Master Fu fixed her with a surprisingly stern look. “You can’t sleep because you took all those memories on so that no one else would have to. You turned into a vampire as Queen Bee because there was no other way to stop Le Paon from hurting other people. You pushed yourself into becoming enough of a shadow creature to have venom so that you could save your friend. So you are paying the price for saving people you didn’t know simply because you believed they didn’t deserve to suffer, and to save someone you cared about. You are a hero, and you are paying a steep price for that. But that doesn’t make you a monster, Chloe. The worst it can make you is a martyr.”

Chloe looked away from him, sighing heavily. “You sound a lot like Marinette.”

“Good,” Master Fu said. “Ladybug is a very clever girl. You should listen to her.”

“She doesn’t understand,” Chloe said softly. “She doesn’t... she doesn’t pay a price when she uses her powers, at least not like the rest of us. And even Chat Noir and Rena Rouge and Carapace can only understand part of what I’m going through. They can’t understand about the vampire part of it.”

“Then why don’t you talk to someone who does?” Master Fu asked, his voice carefully neutral. “You aren’t the only vampire in Paris, after all.”

Chloe flinched. “I can’t talk to Nathaniel. He...” Her voice broke. “I tried to tell him I loved him, when I was still Queen Bee, and I couldn’t. I can’t find a way to be honest with him. I can’t... talk to him, anymore. I’m too scared.”

Master Fu tilted his head. “I think he would understand, even if you couldn’t speak.”

Chloe frowned. “You mean because he’s been through a lot of this stuff too?”

Master Fu shook his head. “I mean because he can read your mind.”

All the blood drained out of Chloe’s face.   
Master Fu smiled slightly. “You forgot about that, didn’t you?”

“What? Of course not,” Chloe protested weakly. “What kind of idiot would forget something that important?”


	2. Adrien

Adrien woke up that morning from another dream about Ladybug dying.

Not his Ladybug, of course. His Ladybug was still alive, and had not died in front of him, looking him directly in the eyes as she gasped out her last words, barely able to speak with the dark hand wrapped around her throat.

_I love you so much, Daniel,_ she had said, a thousand regrets and a million apologies in her eyes.

He screamed as he tried to throw himself forward, but something was wrapped around his arms, holding him back, and though he tried to destroy it, he couldn’t. He couldn’t get to her until they released him finally, after she was already dead, after they had dropped her to the ground like so much garbage.

They’d walked away, leaving him alone in a cell with a body, and he’d held her and screamed. He'd screamed about how they were supposed to grow old together, about how she was supposed to marry him, about how all he wanted in his life was her. He called her name over and over again, not Ladybug, but Maria.

He’d worked so hard to get her to trust him enough to tell him her name, to tell him who she really was. He’d done what so many Chat Noirs had failed to do.

And he’d lost her anyway.

Finally, he’d been able to hear Plagg’s voice in his head, reminding him that he only had a few hours, or a few days if he was lucky, before he followed her, unless Daniel did what they’d previously discussed and broken the bond between them.

And Daniel had told him no. He’d said that he wouldn’t do that to Plagg, and he wanted to spend his last hours or days doing two things: taking Maria’s body back to his family, and getting rid of the people who had killed her.

Plagg had pointed out that Daniel couldn’t escape from the cell, and Daniel had proven him wrong.

Adrien didn’t remember exactly what Daniel had did. He just remembered screaming, and pain, and finally Daniel walking out of a ruined building with Maria’s body in his arms, dead bodies scattered around him, tears running down his face.

Adrien had had dreams like this dozens of times, but none of the dreams had been quite like this one.

This one, he wasn’t just seeing a tiny glimpse of a couple moments of another Chat’s life. This time, he had remembered everything Daniel had. He’d known everything about Daniel’s life.

He'd become Daniel.

He’d loved Maria.

And he’d woken up crying.

He didn’t notice that when he first woke up. He didn’t notice because he was too focused on the gaping hole that he could feel in his chest, like he was being ripped apart from the inside out.

He didn’t notice because he was too busy wrapping his arms around his chest, trying to hold himself together, too busy gasping desperately for breath.

So it took him a while to realize that there were tears falling down his face, and once he noticed, he just started crying harder.

Adrien sobbed into his pillow, shoulders shaking as he tried to get the image of Maria’s dead face out of his mind, but it wouldn’t go anywhere. It was like his brain had been branded with it.

Even as he cried, he could feel the quiet sorrow flowing from Plagg. He was trying to hold it back, to keep from burdening Adrien with his own feelings, but the memories of Daniel had been too painful for him, and he couldn’t hold them all back.

‘I’m sorry, kid,’ Plagg said, his voice subdued. ‘Daniel's death was a bad one. It was worse, because he survived longer than any of my other chosen did after Ladybug did. His death took weeks. It was slow and painful, and it gave him more time to mourn her. It makes his memories of losing Ladybug more vivid than most of theirs.”

The words didn’t help Adrien stop crying. He could feel a hole in his chest, like someone had ripped out his heart and left him bleeding. Daniel had spent weeks feeling like that? Weeks knowing that half of him was gone, and he was never going to get it back?

It took a while for Adrien to calm down, for the memories to fade enough for the ache in his chest to go away, at least mostly.

And once he had calmed down a little, he asked Plagg the question that had been burning in the back of his mind. ‘What did you mean when you told Daniel that he should break the connection between you and him? I thought you said I wouldn’t be able to break my own connection?’

Plagg was silent for a long moment. ‘You can’t. Not with your powers. Daniel... he figured out how to do something... unique with my powers. It’s not something many of my chosen have ever figured how to do. He was the first one since Egypt. So he was the first one since Egypt to have a choice, not to die with his Ladybug.’

Adrien was quiet as he mulled that over. ’But he said that he wouldn’t do that to you?’

Plagg was silent for so long that Adrien thought he wasn’t going to answer, but then he did. ‘I can’t choose to leave someone I’ve been bonded to. Daniel could have given me up, but ripping me away like that would have...  it would have hurt, and I would have been alone for a long time afterward. It... it wouldn’t have been good. He could have saved himself, but I would’ve paid the price. And Daniel wouldn’t do that.’ There was another pause. “Although to be honest, I’m not even sure he wanted to survive without her.’

Adrien didn’t respond to that. He didn’t even know how to.

Plagg didn’t say anything else either, and for a few minutes, everything was quiet.

Finally Adrien got up and got dressed, and only after that did he feel brave enough to talk to Plagg again. ‘Why couldn’t Daniel save her? I didn’t think there was anything that your powers couldn’t break?’

‘Anything but Ladybug’s chains,’ Plagg said, his voice quiet, and serious, and distinctly un-Plagg like. ‘There was a were, back then, who could temporarily control the powers of other were’s and... and that was why Daniel couldn’t get free until... until Maria was...’

Adrien could feel Plagg starting to crumble, feel him shaking from the effort of not letting centuries of memories of losing Chat Noirs get to Adrien.

‘I’m sorry, Plagg,’ Adrien said quietly. ‘Let’s go find some cheese to go with breakfast, yeah?’

There was a moment of silence. Then ‘Oh, so you’ve finally come around and admitted that cheese is the best.’

Adrien laughed, relieved to hear Plagg sounding so much more like himself. ‘Not even close.’

Adrien ran downstairs, and true to his word, he asked for some cheese to go along with breakfast, much to Nathalie’s surprise.

Adrien didn’t like eating the stinky cheese, but it clearly cheered Plagg up, so it was worth it.

After that, he headed out the door and into the car, spending all of his energy on trying not to think about Daniel, or about any of the other Chat Noirs he’d dreamed about.

But he couldn’t help but feel that Daniel had it worse than the others he’d dreamed about. He hadn’t just loved Ladybug. She’d loved him back. She wanted to be with him. They’d planned their future together, and then neither of them had lived long enough to see it, to enjoy any of it.

But he pushed those thoughts out of his head, climbing out of the car and heading to the school, looking for Nino.

But then he saw Chloe.

She’d disappeared during the day yesterday, had taken off at lunch and hadn’t come back. Master Fu had admitted when Chat and Ladybug had stopped by last night that Chloe had come to see him. He’d said that she was still worried about not being able to transform, and about other things.

He hadn’t elaborated, but he hadn’t needed to. Adrien was pretty sure that “other things” meant Nathaniel and the fact that though she tried to hide it, Chloe was turning more and more into a normal vampire instead of the honey vampire she’d been before.

Adrien could tell it was bothering Chloe, but she wouldn’t talk to him about it.

But he made his way over to her anyway. She glanced over at him, and he could tell from her surly expression that she didn’t want to talk to him.

He smiled at her anyway. “Hi, Chloe.”

She glared at him, but then said grudgingly “Hello, Adrikins.”

Adrien frowned. “You’re still calling me that?”

Chloe smiled slightly. “I will always call you Adrikins, Adrikins. Especially if it gets you to make that face.”

Her tone was light, teasing. Friendly, instead of flirty, the way it had been for so long.

Adrien felt a rush of relief and smiled back at her. “Fine, you can call me Adrikins as long as you’re the only one,” he said, and Chloe’s smile grew a little wider. Adrien hesitated for a second, then kept going. “You know, Chloe if, you need to talk about... what’s happened to you... I’m here for you.”

Chloe raised her eyebrows at him. “That’s funny. I was about to say the same thing to you.”

Adrien blinked. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Chloe rolled her eyes. “Come on, Adrikins. I saw the look on your face when you got out of the car, before you put on that model smile. Something’s hurting you, and you’re just pretending that it’s okay. I noticed. And do you know what else? I’m pretty sure that I’m not the only one who did.”

Adrien frowned. “What do you mean?”

Chloe looked away from him, and Adrien followed his gaze to find Marinette staring at him.

He was used to that. He caught Marinette staring at him a lot, for some reason, but normally she looked away when he looked at her.

But this time, she held his gaze, her eyebrows furrowed, her mouth frowning, her eyes full of concern and a silent question.  _Are you okay_ _?_

Adrien smiled weakly at her and then looked back at Chloe. “I’m really okay.”

Chloe sighed. “Look, I’m here early because I’m giving people a chance to talk to me. Because I’m finally ready to start trying not to shut people out. So I don’t need the lecture about how I should talk about my problems or they’ll just get worse. But it looks like you do. You need to talk to someone. And if it’s... stuff that you can’t talk to just anyone about, then lucky for you, you’ve got a best friend you can tell anything to.”

Adrien was so used to hearing her refer to herself as his best friend, that he didn’t realize she wasn’t talking to herself until she nodded to someone behind him, and Adrien turned around to find himself looking at Nino.

Adrien’s mind flashed back to waking up after the fight with Papillion, to opening his eyes to find Carapace and Master Fu sitting by his bed.

Master Fu had simply asked him if he felt okay, then said he was glad he was awake and went to check on Ladybug.

But Carapace had stayed by his bed, looking relieved, but also apprehensive about something.

Adrien had asked him what he was thinking about, and finally Carapace had burst out talking, words pouring out of his mouth like he couldn’t stop himself.

“I know we’re not supposed to share our identities with each other willy-nilly, but I know all of your identities, and I can’t stand the idea of keeping mine a secret from you. Like I know it might not be safe, but you... you’re practically my family. I mean, you’re my best bud...”

Adrien had realized he was not going to stop talking anytime soon, so he cut in. “Nino.”

“So I have to tell you who I am, because I know who you are now, and I was shocked, and then I was shocked that I was shocked, because I really should have seen it sooner, a...” Carapace continued.

“Nino,” Adrien had said, louder this time.

“And we talk all the time and I don’t think I can pretend that I don’t know that I don’t know who you are while I’m talking to you all the time, and...”

“NINO!”

Carapace, Nino, had finally stopped talking to stare at Adrien. “You already know who I am.”

“Well I didn’t before you started rambling,” Adrien had said, and Nino had smiled, embarrassed.

And then he’d thrown his arms around Adrien. “I’m so glad that you’re okay.”

They’d talked about a lot of things, since then, but Adrien hadn’t told him about the nightmares.

“Hi, dude,” Nino said, holding his fist.

Adrien bumped it. “Hi, Nino.” He glanced back at Chloe, but she had disappeared. He looked back at Nino. “There’s something that I... I think I should talk to you about.”

Nino frowned. “Is something wrong, dude?”

Adrien nodded slowly. “Yes. I havne’t talked to anyone about this, even Master Fu, but...”

Understanding clicked in Nino’s eyes. “Oh, that kind of problem. Okay, dude. We’ll talk after school, okay. Somewhere less... crowded. And don’t worry. You can talk to me about anything.”

Adrien nodded, relieved. “Thanks, Nino. You’re the best. You always have my back.

And Nino- Carapace- smiled broadly back at him. “That’s my job.”

They headed inside, and as they walked, Adrien couldn’t help but think that he really should have known who Carapace was sooner.


End file.
